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My parents had strict rules and harsh punishments when those rules weren't followed. The effect would be that I had a hard time being sociable and having confidence in myself.
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Harr Harlow's Studies:. I didn't fgo for heir comfort and protection when stressed or surpirsed due to the inability to form an attachment with either or them
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Having reflexes: rooting, sucking, grasping, moro. Developed first schemata, seeing the world from our own lens, includling not having object permanence. Therefore, believing objects can disapppear after seeing them .
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Crying helps attain things wanted or needed by caregiver.
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I'm able to squirm and move around slightly.
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My older sister, Sarah held me in her arms and began kissing my cheeks. The first few kisses caught my attention but when I got fed up, I began crying.
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Placing toys that usually generated music in my mouth.
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When mom would ask me if I'd like to go to a park, I'd say, "no." However, when asked to go to a restaurant, I'd say, "yes"
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object permanence acquired though I lacked empathy. Therefore, I thought poeple wanted/liked what I wanted or liked. I
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When my sister was toilet trained, I was also taught to stop wearing diapers at day time. As says passed, I decided on my own to completely stop wearing diapers.
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When my mom's relative which was a male first entered the house, I resented the sight of him and hated that I'd refer him as a "he"
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When a boy exposed his genitals after using the bathroom,I was intigued by such physical difference and unknown distinction that humans can posssess.
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My mom was out all day and I never seeked for her presence. I wasn't concerned about her presence nor about her absence.
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Behavior and attitudes mostly consistent and calm.
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HWne horseback riding, I identified the horse that I was riding as a male due to its aggressive and active behavior, while the calm and regualted one that my sister was riding as a female.
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When I first traveled to America, I met my half-sisters and they seemed as if they're all my parents. They'd give me gifts and spoil me, therefore, I loved them.
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Since I was egocentric at the time, I'd show-off my toys to my friends and gave the toy I most favored to a friend. However, I took my sister's toy as a replacement.
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I finally set my mind on what my favorite color is and it was pink back then because my dad bought me a barbie doll that wore pink clothings and accessories. (Gender schema)
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The winning team of the race would be awarded with a trophy and treats. Unfortunately, my nerves got the best of me and failed to win a single running race. Therefore, I had inferiority complex in a running competition.
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I asked my mom, "Why women wear abayas." I was curious about the environment and that curiosity was acknowledged by my mom. Though, my friends usually hated it and would be irritated by my inquisitive questions.
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The school was Manarat and it mostly Arabic-speaking environment
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Pop told me to never put the glass at the edge of the table. I've never placed a glass at the edge of a table ever since that day due to thinking about the consequences of opposing his instruction.
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Started examining mom's makeup and applying it.when she prepared for a wedding that she had to go to.
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My hair was thick and puffy. Though, my hair seemed short at the time, it was actually long. My hair was braided as preparation to go to school. I noticed that my hair appeared straighter and longer. The volume of my hair is conserved though it was contained.Though my hair was rearranged, I knew that my hair can easily return to its normal position. The number of hair remains consistent though it seemed less to a child that's not at the stage of concrete operations.
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Though, I haven't been praying consistently. I lacked the desire to pray due to feeling fatigue on that day. Therefore, I willed my body forcibly to pray Duhr for the people ( students and teadchers) to view me as a good person.
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Parents acted freely when I accomplished something acknowledgable or caused a fault. Therefore, guidlines were never made such as punishments or curfews. Parents were spontaneous, therefore punishments or rewards can be made based on their feelings or desires.
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I left the school called manarat and moved to AISJ.
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I learnt about how good deeds and following the five Islamic principles would lead to having a position in heaven. Though a child hasn't heaven. It has simply been described to us, therefore, was can logically see ourselves in heaven and imagine the environment and situation about the condition in heaven. I perceived heaven as walking on clouds without possessing physical feet, more like hovering our weightless souls using our ability of flying.
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Parents don't understand my preferences and feelings about a situation. They're not concerned about their involvements, therefore, decisions are usually directly made by me or dictated by them. No punishments or consequences involved due to failing to notice any merits or demerits.
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This protrays that I learn what it means to lose an attachment. Therefore, I'm more aware that eventually people come and go from one's life. Then, they may return or leave for good.
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In Ethiopia, I got two ear-piearcings on the upper part of my ear because I thought it suited my persona.
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In Ethiopia, mostly teenagers got a mohawk hair cut. Therefore, I thought about having it done for my hair as well. I thought that it might suit my behavior, though when contemplating, I realized that it might have future consequences. Then, I decided to simply get a bob cut.
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The half-sister seemed selfish, manipulative and deceitful. First action, Gina came 2 hours later to the airport and we had plenty of baggage. However, she didn't assist us by aiding us in carrying single load.Therefore, I anticipated for her selfish actions and used logical reasoning to therefore, protray as a person who has their own agenda and lacks empathy towards others.
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My mom suddenly told me to wear decent clothings, though, I've been wearing shorts since our arrival in America.
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Pop told me that my half-sisters are basically completely family. He was trying to tell me that I should be more open and friendly to them. Though, I wasn't going to blindly respect his desire due to knowing that they'd never reciprocate my selfless acts. However, knowing my offish behavior wouldn't please pop nor would it be please my half-sisters, I knew this was the only way I can spare myself for the pain and ache I'd feel if I exposed my insecurities and truths about myself to them.
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When mom was fasting, we bought her a burger and returned home. Even though, we had plans to spend the rest of the evening out.
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Due to life spent mostly apart from parents would either help in wanting to build a closer relationship with parents or want to live exactly the way they did and want to spend life investing in our own isolated lives from family. I would spent most of my time working and focusing on either building a family or finding a deeper meaning or life.
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After the whole week spent working, I spend the weekend with my parents. I had an interesting conversation with them and helped them by doing chores.
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Over time, I've been thinking about whether or not I want to start a family or get married. That day, I found out about my nephew bothering my sister and I couldn't believe how someone who's blood-related can act in such a way. I had the mind-set that I can never trust anyone and being married or being in a relationships is based on trust. And I would never trust anyone and I had high blood pressure. I could die from surprises, anxiety and heart aches.
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Make changes to follow my plans in life since I do realize that my life path is what I chose it to be.
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I felt the need to move there, the spirit of that country spoke to me. I knew that it would heal that partial emptiness I feel. I packed my bags and immediately left because I felt that it would make my life complete.
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I step outside the pressures and anxiety of scoiety. Then, I open up a small school where people can't afford tuition can go to. I is completely free for the kids who have the will to obtain knowledge.
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I realized that the hotel building that I own has provides for so many people in need of shelter with such low rent, though it was luxurious. The income that was obtained by this building would be used for a small school. It was taught elderly people who hope to end their life while having served a meaningful purpose.
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I die peacerfully though instaneously when trying to water my garden. My body gave in and I fell on my lawn. Soundlessly, breathed the words relating to my belief in God and closed my eyes sadly knowing that I'm liberated from a life filled with grief of my loss in life: my parents, sisters, grandparents who made me hoped for this day to have come sooner. Sadness filled my body as my organs began shutting down for this day was a proof of how incompetent one's life may seem when this was the end.
