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Saddest Day Ever(Birth)
Born in Garden Grove Hospital on November 7, 2000 as the 3rd child of a now 9 child home. -
First Day of Kindergarten
I entered school later then most kids and for this reason I had to skip preschool and went straight to elementary and remember getting very anxious and scared. It took me a few days or week to finally stop crying on the bus to school . I remember my older brother and sister having to drag me into the bus because I wouldn't go in. Today school is a way to pass the time instead of staying home and wasting my time watching tv. -
Caught Stealing at School
During my 5th grade year a student reported that their supplies were missing and the teacher announced that she was going to search all the backpacks in the class and I wasn't worried about getting in trouble because I didn't do anything, however when the teacher opened up my bag there it was , the missing supplies . I was so confused and the teacher told me to step outside and began to basically spit in my face and took me to the office. To this day I don't know how or why it was in my bag. -
Near Death Experience
At the age of 12 or 13 I went to the doctor's office to check out a rash/infection all around my body. When we arrived at the doctors office the doctor told my mom that the rash could be a sign of deadly infection and told her to take me to the hospital to get my blood tested. When I was waiting for my blood results to return I began to cry and realized that from that moment on I didn't want to die. -
6th Grade Graduation
When I was 12 I graduated elementary school and although I don't remember this as being something so special to me, I do believe it was special for my parents and that was enough to keep me going. -
First Gaming Console(Xbox)
On my 12 birthday I was given the choice between getting a Xbox Original or a Xbox 360 and me being the smartest person in the world I decided to get the Original Xbox . However, I don't regret getting the Original Xbox because, it led me to experience my favorite games to date. For example, Halo 1 and 2, Spy Vs Spy, and Conker's Bad Fur Day. Today I am a PlayStation gamer who still plays shooter games. -
Another Near Death Experience
When I was 13 and lived at my old house my mom was out shopping and my older sister and brother were at a school program , I was talking to one of my younger brothers while we talked and ate hard candy. I don't remember why or what the joke was but we began to laugh and I began to choke on one of the hard candies I had in my mouth. I didn't know what to do so I ran into my parents room were my dad who was taking his day off from work and was able to do the Heimlich maneuver on me which saved me. -
Discovered My Enjoyment of Horror Films
Before going to a New Year Party at my cousins house my brother and I were watching T.V and The Twilight Zone show came on and it was really interesting to me and I didn't want to leave the screen because ever scene was filled with suspense and then a scary reveal. Today now I like to watch scary videos and movies in the middle of the night. -
8th Grade Graduation
This time my graduation went much more differently. I wasn't proud of myself anymore and didn't know if my parents were either. I think this was due to how much kids we had at the time which was probably already 6 or 7. This led to them not having the time to take care of everyone at the same time and only my mom was there to pick me up from school and gave me a necklace of candy.To me this helped me realize that life isn't going to be as "happy" as I thought it was going to be. -
Confusion Year
After my first year of high school everything seemed okay and normal and during the first semester of my 10th grade year everything was perfect I had B's, C's and sometimes even A's in my classes. This only lasted for a while as towards the end of the 1st semester I got out of a relationship because of a mistake I made and I blamed myself and still do. With this in my head plus the thought that my parents didn't care I decided to give up on everything including school and myself.I stopped caring -
Visit To Police Station
Due to the lack of self care, I began to stop going to school which led to me being truant . This caused the school to believe that I was lazy and didn't want to come to school because of my video games. I went to 3 meetings about the consequences of not going to school but none of them mattered to me until I was at the last meeting which was at police station. It was here that a Police officer didn't blame me but blamed my parents and this was enough for me to change my ways for them. -
Therapy Session
The counselor at my school told my parents to take me to therapist and so they did. At the therapy session I was a closed book that didn't want to open up to anyone and since my parents didn't know why I was acting this way, they weren't able to open up my thoughts and feelings for me and so the sessions were pointless. However, I began to do better in school this year because all the work I do is for my parents not me and that keeps my grades at A's and sometimes B's. -
Even More Confusion (Being A Teen Sucks)
During the summer I began to experience feelings for other people besides females. I don't know what triggered this but, I think it was due to my previous relationship not going so well and at least for me was that guys were my simple and being a guy to allowed me to know what they wanted most of time. Many people like to make fun of and ask why someone is homosexual.The simple answer is I don't really know maybe its due to genes or life experiences, I believe it could be a bit of both. -
Sick Jokes
Although there is no excuse that can make what someone says less serious or hurtful , I like to make myself believe that sometimes people aren't thinking in the moment because they are so caught up with fitting in. As for me I made what I thought was a joke about shooting up the school and when the teacher called me out on it , I reacted to quickly to think right and say the right words and the only words that came out were "It wasn't" and now I am here writing this . Great. Lesson learned. -
What's Next?
In the situation that I have gotten in myself the only thoughts I can think about what should I do now?I know that me getting in trouble wasn't wrong and I deserved it but how should I live my life now?I always used jokes as a coping mechanism to block out any negative thoughts but now I know that some of my jokes shouldn't be well "jokes".What do I have to change or become just so everyone else can carry on with their lives and I can carry on with my life. Whatever the choice,It will change me.
