Timeline of My Life Kevin Kunkle

Birth

Oct 3, 1993

I was born on October 3rd, 1993 in Washington DC. I was a cheerful baby with loving parents who raised me well.

Basic Trust v. Mistrust (Infant - 18 months)

Oct 3, 1994

From my birth to being 1 year old, my basic needs as an infant were completely met by the parents. My mother, specificaally provided me with constant food and comfort. Since my parents exposed me to regular affection, I took a view of trust to the world.

Autonomy v. Shame and Doubt (18 months - 3 years)

Oct 3, 1995

As a child, I begin to inrease my motorskill abilities. I start to explore my surroundings more while my parents provide a strong base of security to guide me through my explorations. Because my parents patienty encouraged me, I was able to develop autonomy, or self-control of my actions and success.

My first football

Jan 1, 1996

My father gives me my first football at age 2. He wants me to start developing my throwing motion at a young age. This is important for my career choices later in life.

Birth of my sister Kathryn

Sep 23, 1996

My sister was born on September 23rd, 1996 in Washington DC. It was tough for me as a child to not be the center of attention, but I grew to like my sister.

Initiative v. Guilt (3 - 5 years )

Oct 3, 1997

I begin to master the world around me, as I learn more and more basic skills and ideas. My motor skills develop further, and I obtain a sense the basic laws of physics. I start wanting to complete my own actions to show purpose. Through taking initiative, I often fail, and sometimes I will feel guilt.. However, my parents maintain encouragement for me to try new things and tell me to embrace failure and to not be fearful or regretful of it.

Enrollment in Bullis

Sep 3, 2002

I am accepted into Bullis and choose to enroll as a third grader. I meet many friends in school, and Bullis teaches me the fundemental ideals of leadership that I will need later in life.

Industry vs. Inferiority (5 - 13 years)

Oct 3, 2002

I start to become more aware of myself as an individual. I try to share and cooperate yet get in occasional fights with students and teachers. I am very eager to learn and acheive success in everything I do. I develop a competitive edge fueled by my hatred of losing. My self-confidence increases, and I believe I can accomplish anything with my hard work and creativity.

Identity vs. Role Confusion (13 to 21 years)

Oct 3, 2011

As my 18th birthday passes, I am pressured by the stresses of college applications and senior year. I make descisions to establish my own identity in the world. I have somewhat of an identity crisis as I choose my college major and what I hope to acheive. However, I soon find my identity in college.

Enrollment in Miami University

Oct 3, 2012

I choose to take my talents to South Beach and become a Miami Hurricane. This descision has huge implications on my career path. I walk on to Miami's D1 football program as a quarterback/safety combo. I ride the bench my first year, and, in my second year, the starting QB goes down with a season ending achilles tear, giving me my chance at success.

Success at Miami

Jan 9, 2016

I lead the Miami Football team to 3 consecutive BCS Championships, while playing starting QB and safety. I become the first QB in NCAA history to pass for over 15,000 career yards. I graduate with a 4.0 average and immediately hire an agent to help me with my declaration for the NFL draft.

Drafted #1 overall in the 2017 Draft by the Miami Dolphins

Apr 25, 2017

The Miami Dolphins pick me #1 overall to immediately start at QB. I start off my career by taking the Dolphins to the Super Bowl as a rookie and losing my right throwing hand in a botched play with 2 minutes left in the 4th quarter. I take the Dolphins 80 yards, with all lefty throws and score the gamewinning touchdown on a 17 yard run with :01 second remaining. I hailed as a hero in Miami history even though I can no longer play football with no right hand.

Dating Megan Fox

Jun 4, 2018

During the Summer after my amazing Super Bowl comback victory, I begin to date superstar celebrity Megan Fox. We date for 1 year until I break up with her because I need my space.

Started Foundation for HandiJobs

Apr 3, 2026

I started a Charity with my billions of endorsement cash to help those with missing limbs, specifically hands, like myself, find employment. The foundation, appropriately "HandiJobs", has amazing success and I am reveled once again for my acheivements.

Win Facebook

Apr 9, 2031

I win Facebook from Zuckerburg in a shady dog fighting bet. I am very excited to abuse my access to private information of millions of Americans.

Intimacy vs. Isolation

Oct 3, 2038

After having many, many relationships with hundreds of female models and celebrities, I finally settle down with Megan Fox's daughter, Jenny Fox. It is a little awkward at first because I briefly dated Jenny's mother, Megan, but Jenny is already 19 and is ready for a mature relationship. I made intelligent descision to force Jenny to sign a pre-nup. We stay married for 5 years.

Birth of my son, Cosmo Kramer

Mar 9, 2041

My son is born on March 9th 2041. I am very proud to have a son and am excited to raise him correctly.

Generativity vs. Stagnation (41 to 65 years)

Oct 3, 2043

As I turn 50, I begin to question whether I have purpose in my life and if I can create things of real value in my life. In order to prevent stagnation, I divorce my wife Jenny and pursue experimental reconstructive hand surgery.

Bionic Hand Transplant

May 10, 2050

All of my hard work pays off and I finally develop the design of a fully functional bionic hand. I am the first person to use the hand to its full power.

Cosmo Graduates

Jun 14, 2059

Cosmo barely graduates from High School and is a huge disapoint to me. I shun him from the family and my wealth.

Ego Integrity vs. Despair (65 years - Death)

Feb 7, 2067

As I enter my late years, I begin to contemplate my accomplishments realize I need to acheive more. I launch a wormhole creation program that allows intergalactic travel.

Wormhole Malfunction Destroys Jupiter

Feb 7, 2073

My first Wormhole creation attempt sucked in nearly 38% of Jupiter before its deactivation. This is a huge failure that sends me into deep depression. I turn to alcoholism and delve deep into my work on Wormhole studies.

Successful Wormhole allows contact with Aliens

Aug 10, 2078

After striving for success for nearly a decade, I finally create a completely functional system of Wormholes that allows Earth to travel to any conceivable part of the universe. I am hailed as the greatest scientist ever and win 4 Nobel Prizes.

Death

Oct 3, 2083

I die on my birthday when I turn 90. It is a sad day for America as the greatest human being of all time has passed. I am thankful to have reached 90 and release a death letter of demands.

Death Letter

Oct 3, 2083

I have lived a good life. The only wish I have is for my wealth to go to my son Cosmo. Even though he was a terrible disappointment and will waste all the money on his cocaine habit, I pray he will create some good. You're welcome cruel world.