-
Birth
The world was graced with me. You're welcome. -
Toddler Time
Look at how fat I was -
Formal Education Begins
Kindergarten was great. The rest was not. -
Christian Education????
My mom sent us to a Christian school because I got bullied in public school. Probably because I was a know-it-all and a teachers pet. Honestly? I deserved it. -
MBCI
I learned to play the French horn to channel how annoying I was -
Grad
She did it folks! What a miracle tbh -
U of M
Ongoing -
Grad 2.0
Graduates with a 4.5 GPA probably -
Lands Dream Job
Teaching 6-7 & 10-12 Band. Music is fully funded. I get 3 months of paid vacation. -
I win the lottery
I have like 4 billion dollars now -
Meet my Soulmate
He's beautiful and tall and looks like a greek statue.
He is respectful and also rich -
We get Married
Destination wedding in Hawaii. All my friends are there. My exes all see our beautiful wedding photos. They weep. I drink MaiTais in my wedding dress. -
Buy a house
Multimillion dollar home with a slide that goes from the top floor to the main floor. My husband buys me a corvette. -
The end
Global warming kills us all.
