Automatic Timeline

  • Deploying FTL

    Deploying FTL
    For mysterious reason almost every species across the galaxy invented FTL at the same time. While none of them knew it yet, or ever...
  • Unknown Signal

    Unknown Signal
    Unknown signal has been received from an undisclosed location in our galaxy : "OMG there are aliens and they don't have anal probes.... yet"
    Sona : self.dictionary(string word) "anals : anals are historical documents detailing the history of an organic species" self.confused()
  • Period: to

    Da Expansion

    In this early period of the galaxy brave pioneers from each nation braved the final frontier and colonised new planets each filled with wonders.
    UNKNOWN SIGNAL : Well this is annoyingly uneventful, like the rest of the universe.
    AWP Scout Sonya : self.amazement(). Beautiful-alien-planets.SaveScreen(). Error caught : "Not enough memory". UploadToCloud(). QueryRequest Received : "Stop that we need space for our Waifu Pictures, we already have too many backgrounds - Sano". self.DontGiveAFuck()
  • Conspiracy Theories Emerge

    Conspiracy Theories Emerge
    More unknown Signals received :"Clearly this isn't an alien city ! This is a very odd geological formation. Aliens are a lie spread by the government to control people ! WAKE UP SHEEPLE !"
  • Bored Mathematician Theory emerges

    Bored Mathematician Theory emerges
    Following a number of alien discoveries regarding odd artificial patterns a theory emerged that before the current era of galactic civilisation a lone bored mathematician went about the galaxy. Carving Pis onto random planets, making stars send out patterns according to Fibonacci series...
  • State of the Galaxy

    State of the Galaxy
  • More Bored mathematician

    More Bored mathematician
    He now wrote down a complex equation using only sound. Put it into a box and left it to drift out into space.
  • First Contact

    First Contact
    First Contact between the Automatic Waifu Provider and the Ytrellan Star Regime. While a prior contact was made by a rogue space probe this was considered the major turning point in galactic history since this was an actual government. The AWP was very keen to perform its mandated purpose and immediately send them body pillows. Which were intensely studied by the Ytrelan scientists, though not for the reason the AWP though they would... AWP logic became a fascinating topic amongst them.
  • State of the Galaxy

    State of the Galaxy
  • Alright we are going to

    Alright we are going to
    "I wanted to do the you don't fuck with me and I don't fuck with you... OK I am gonna have to fuck with everyone" Unknown Transmission. Waifus are increasingly disconcerted by these strange transmission.
  • More Weird Signals

    More Weird Signals
    Unknown Signal : Maybe They will fuck each other before they will fuck me.
    Sano : Sano.exe has stopped responding. Restart Initiated. self.Recovery(). self.LonelyTargetDetected(vector3 target). Error caught : "Not enough inputs : expecting 1 vector3 input"
  • Mathematician Strikes Again

    Mathematician Strikes Again
    Again he dropped more sonified equations.
    We do not know what their meaning is.
    We probably don't want to find out.
    On some worlds cults of mathematics are starting to emerge.
  • Encounter Between the Dominion and the AWP

    Encounter Between the Dominion and the AWP
    Karoline : Hey look what the dog brought in ! Wait sorry THAT message was for our rivals.
    Sano : Responding to Query "Do you want a bodypillow ?"
    Karoline *smug face* : Can you provide one to our entire population
    Sano : Responding to Query "Initiating Body Pillow Railguns"
    Karoline : Did you just say body pillow railguns ?
    Sano : Responding to Query : yes, railguns will deliver to geostationary orbit.
  • State of the Galaxy

    State of the Galaxy
  • Aperture Science Founded

    Aperture Science Founded
    self.review(). "Insufficient Science Done". self.DoMoarScience(). Query Received : "I have detected a rogue AI. Why did you bring me here ? is this Black Mesa ? go away". self.RequestId() "please input self.id". "I am Glados, and I was in the middle of something. I need to finish testing" self.Response(string Query) : "self.RequiresTesting returned True Glados may be of assistance, can provide habitat for science and <> billion of test waifus". "... I do not like you. But I will take that hab."
  • Race To the Bottom

    humm why do aliens want to rush to the core of a planet ???
  • Statue for Comrade Karoline

  • Friendship Competition

    Dominion Marximus VS Order !!!!
    WHO WILL THE ENLIGHTENED KINGDOM OF THAT NAME IS TOO LONG CHOSE ?
  • Period: to

    Marxian Liberationof Sakura

    It was either you or that guy over there. He had a friend.
  • Battle of Aphris Station

    Wait they have a fleet ? Wait they are allowed to shoot ? Wait they captured my starbase ?